Sometimes you want to have sex standing up, other times you want to lie back and let your partner work their magic. On other occasions, you want to try a kinky position, or one that lets your partner go really (really) deep. Then there are those times when you just want all the control. When those dominant feels strike, there’s just one course of action to take: get on top.
A woman-on-top sex position will let you dictate the depth and angle of penetration, as well as the speed, plus it may be able to help you reach orgasm more easily, says Reba Thomas, a pleasure-positive sex educator and CEO of Sexpert Consultants, a company that specializes in adult sex health education. “Being on top feels great for people with clitorises because over 70 percent of people with vulvas require external clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. When you’re on top (and you lean forward), the friction helps awaken the clitoral cluster, and when you’re more aroused, the pleasure is better for everyone.”
But being on top doesn’t mean you always have to resort to cowgirl (as amazing as it is). In fact, there are actually 16 different woman-on-top positions for you to get creative with while riding your partner’s strap-on or penis, and plenty of these allow for additional stimulation like nipple play with your free hands or a vibrator.
Want to get started tonight? To give you inspo for your next sex sesh, here are some of the best woman-on-top positions, according to a sexpert.
From this position, you’re totally in control of the angle and depth of penetration, says Thomas. “The person on top has control over how they’re being penetrated and because the bodies are so close, there’s bound to be friction on the external part of the clitoris.” Not only that, but your hands are also 100 percent free to do as they please–whether it’s show your clit some love or get fun and handsy with your partner’s erogenous zones.
Do it: Your partner sits on a chair or the edge of the bed; you face them, seated on their lap.
“This is one of the most vibrator-friendly positions,” says Thomas. This classic woman-on-top position puts you in total control, and you can try adding a little spice by incorporating a couples vibrator like Eva or by playing around with how wide you spread your legs. If you want to level up the action, try holding your partner’s hands above their head (or tying them up…).
Do it: You kneel on top, pushing off your partner’s chest and sliding up and down their thighs. You can relieve some of your weight from their pelvis by leaning back and supporting yourself on their thighs.
3. Cowgirl’s Helper
The Cowgirl’s Helper puts less stress on your legs, making reaching that sweet, sweet orgasm way less strenuous (score!). You can also try alternating between shallow penetration by leaning forward and deep thrusting by sitting up straighter to target different parts of your vagina, in particular your G-spot, says Thomas.
Do it: Similar to the popular Cowgirl sex position, you kneel on top, pushing off your partner’s chest and sliding up and down the thighs. But your partner helps by supporting some of your weight and grabbing your hips or thighs while they rise to meet each thrust.
4. Reverse Cowgirl
This is a great variation on classic Cowgirl. Again, it lets you take control of the pace and angle of thrusts. If you want to add some extra stimulation, Thomas recommends asking your partner to shift their position a bit. “You can enhance this position by asking the penetrating partner to bend their knees, which will allow you to stimulate your clitoris.” Their thighs will create the perfect surface to rub your clit against during sex. Yes, please.
Do it: Your partner lies on their back; you straddle them, facing their feet.
5. Champagne Room
This position, while allowing you to regulate just how fast and intense the sex is going to be, works for both vaginal and anal sex. Plus, your hands are free to roam and stimulate your clit, your partner’s inner thighs, or even their anus for double (or triple) the pleasure, says Thomas.
Do it: Your partner sits and you sit on top of them, facing away.
6. The Om
If you want to slow things down and have intimate, sensual sex, opt for The Om. Try rocking, rather than thrusting in this position—not only will it stimulate your clit, but it will also gradually build up to an epic finale for both of you. Not to mention, you get some seriously sexy eye contact with this one which is major for intimacy. Thomas says this setup also makes it easier to find a rhythm. “Creating a steady and consistent rhythm, which is key for many people to reach orgasm, is easy in this position.”
Do it: Your partner sits cross-legged (yoga/pretzel-style), you sit in their lap facing them. Wrap your legs around them and hug each other for support.
7. The Lazy Man
This position puts you in control, and maintains plenty of intimacy. Think of your partner’s pelvis as a masturbatory tool, something to rub and stimulate your clitoris with and against. To make this position even hotter, Thomas recommends adding in some nipple play. “If your partner stimulates your breasts in this position by sucking, licking, or massaging, that can increase arousal and pleasure for you both.”
Do it: Place pillows behind your partner’s back and have them sit on the bed with legs outstretched. Now straddle their waist, feet on the bed. Bend your knees to lower yourself onto them, using one hand to direct the penis or strap-on in. Just by pressing on the balls of your feet and releasing, you can raise and lower yourself onto the shaft as slowly or as quickly as you please.
8. Pretzel Dip
Think of this sex position as doggy style, except with eye contact and a pretty good view of your partner’s body. Aside from being great for penetration with a penis or strap-on, Thomas says this position is also pretty ideal for getting handsy. “The Pretzel Dip is a great position for stimulating the clitoris either with a hand, toy, or thigh.”
Do it: Have your partner lie on their right side; then kneel, straddling your right leg and curling your left leg around their left side.
9. Leap Frog
If you live for deep penetration, add this to your list of go-to’s. “Leap Frog with an arched back is great for deep penetration,” says Thomas, who adds that you can up the intensity of this position by stimulating the tip of the clitoris to ensure maximum arousal.
Do it: This is a modified doggy-style. Have your partner get on their hands and knees, then, keeping their hips raised, enter them from behind with your finger or strap-on.
This position may put both of your flexibilities to the test. This move allows for deep penetration, stimulation of the clit, and lots of grinding. Thomas adds that the friction against the vulva can also make this position worth the extra effort.
Do it: From missionary position, your partner raises their legs and extends them straight out (forming a “V”).
11. The Spider
From this seated position, you get to watch all the sexy action. Plus, you can also try taking it a step further by placing your partner’s legs on your shoulders, which will make it easier for you to thrust and move your hips in circles. Want to make it even hotter? Reach down and stimulate your partner’s clitoris, says Thomas, or their nipples or inner thighs.
Do it: Sit on the bed with legs toward one another, arms back to support yourselves. Now move together so your genitals are touching, or enter them with your strap-on. Their hips will be between your spread legs, your knees bent, and feet outside of their hips and flat on the bed. Now rock back and forth.
Sometimes you just gotta go with what you know and missionary position is a tried and true position for many couples. Thomas suspects it’s such a popular position because it allows women to rub their clitorises up against their partners. That, and it’s one that’s ideal for eye contact if you’re looking to add some intimacy to your sex.
Do it: Do I really need to spell this one out? Okay. Have them lie on their back while you lie facedown on top of them.
13. Magic Mountain
Okay, so maybe you’re not on top, per se, but you are in control. You get to decide how much you rub your clitoris against your partner’s pelvis. Plus, because you’re facing each other, this position helps you feel really connected not only physically, but emotionally too. “The eye contact in this position really adds to the intimacy and helps partners focus on the here and now and what’s happening between their bodies,” says Thomas.
Do it: Your partner sits, legs bent, leaning back on their hands and forearms. You do the same and then inch toward them until you make contact.
14. Golden Arch
You’ll be the one in complete control over the depth, speed, and angle of the thrusts. “This position is great for exploring which types of strokes and depth of penetration really does it for you,” says Thomas. From this position you can also easily lean back farther for some extra G-spot stimulation, and you (or your partner) have easy access to your clit.
Thomas’s pro-tip is to make sure you arch your back while in this position. “Arching your back can change the angle that the penis [or strap-on] comes in contact with the vaginal wall and internal parts of the clitoris,” she explains.
Do it: Your partner sits with their legs straight and you sit on top of them with bent knees on top of their thighs, and you both lean back.
15. The Chairman
This sex position is great for that G-spot love. Plus, your hands are both free for some sexy stroking. This position is ideal for exploring different angles of penetration, says Thomas. “Leaning forward or back changes angles and can help you and your partner find out what works for you both,” she says.
Do it: Your partner sits on the edge of the bed and you sit on them, facing away.
16. Woman Astride
Target your G-spot while maintaining control over the speed and depth of thrusts. And, from this reclined position, it’s an obvious invitation for your partner to stroke away at your clit and play with your breasts. says Thomas, so “give them the love they deserve,” she adds.
Do it: This position is just like Cowgirl, but with a twist. Climb on top and have your partner enter you. Then, lean back and place your hands on the bed for support, creating a 45-degree angle with your partner’s legs.